OK.
This is a little hard to talk about.







OK.








I had a sexy dream about Nick Cannon.









I don't know why or how it happened, but it happened. And I don't remember many of the particulars (there was a car, we talked about my mom, and then jungle fever ensued). All I know is that I woke up in a cold sweat with an incorrigible crush and then I Netflixed 'Drumline.' And I've spent my entire Saturday looking for reruns of Wylin' Out on TV Guide Online.

Seriously, what's next? The Apocalypse?!?

Something's... Wrong.

This would be the greatest website ever if I could shut up that nagging voice in the back of my head that says, "Wait... Isn't Kelly Osbourne a fat little piggy in real life?"

http://www.paperdollheaven.com/dolls/kellyosbourne.145.php

Parts Unknown.

Dearest readers,

Attica will be enjoying a much needed mental health break in the upcoming days. She has departed for an undisclosed tropical location and will return after a short stay. Providing an offer of marriage by a local is not placed on the vocational table.

Thanks as usual for your kind patronage.

Warmest regards,
Chulo
Morality Carwash Liaison of International Affairs